joe2poetry

Poetry from a Dublin Scientist

An Ode To Zombiestrippers

“They’re zombiestrippers”

I kid you not, this┬áline’s used in a scene

This film is simply stranger still

Than any it may seem

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The “Plot” if I may use that word

Is simplicity itself

Made with all the characters

They could find on the shelf

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Ex-Porn Star Jenna Jameson

Is the star of the hour

First infected by the zombies

When things turn extra sour

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The other famous face I see

Is Robert Englund

Who falls afoul of zombies fair

And left me super-stunned

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This film includes I may add

Breasts flying about

And stereotypical army types

Who always shoot and shout

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There girl and girl fights

Undead heads, more blood than most these rippers

You could do worse than renting out

These crazy Zombiestrippers

A Politician’s Creed

Good hair is important

With teeth so white they beam

And it would be an asset if

Folks can’t grasp what you mean

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Each line you speak’s a sound bite

A policy a phrase

Fool them all with so much words

It leaves them in a daze

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Your past can be your downfall

So hide it in plain sight

If you can be unmemorable

Then you’ll get on all right

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Memories a fickle thing

If you promise the Earth

You can get the best of jobs

And take all of it’s worth

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A politician’s job’s quite fun

It’s quite simple to do

Just acts like you care for folks

Even if it’s not true

Haikus 23/04/14

Lunch time is long past

Running back to the office

Late again for work

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Travelling abroad

Conference or some work thing

Where will I go next

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My love’s on the screen

So close yet so very far

Talking over Skype

Haikus 15/04/14

In Brussels, Belgium
Watching the whole world go by
Eating a waffle

Fine art gallery
Perhaps unwise for parties
Drunk people and art?

A diffent field
That’s so far over my head
I’ll never see it

A picture

You are a picture
A picture of beauty
A paeon of kindness
With a soul bright as the Sun
And a smile that sparkles like starshine
You are a picture to me
Almost like a mirage
So perfect
So unbelievably amazing
That sometimes I can’t believe that you’re real
Then you see me
Smile
And rush into my arms
And I know
That you’re indeed a picture
Of all I have to be thankful for
Of all I need and want from the world
Of simply, the woman I love

To Me

Let me tell you
Before anything else
That to me
You are beautiful
To me you are perfect
You are my ideal
My one and only
The only one for me
I could walk the world
Travel to its furthermost corners
And never find one such as you
Never find one with such an inner light
One who is
To me
The woman of my dreams

Haikus 10/04/14

Trousers are too tight
The zip breaks under the strain
All embarrassment

I’ll tell you stories
Some funny and others sad
Life in spoken word

A cute cocktail dress
Barely one piece of fabric
Easy to take off

What For

One evening I was sitting
My eyes idly flitting
And I thought it would be fitting
To visit my local store

They have great goods a plenty
For both commoner and Gentry
But is guarded by a sentry
Whose half human, half wild boar

And due to a brief mishap
Which I’ve no desire to recap
The guard wants to break my knee cap
If I’m caught just one time more

But finances can be tricky
And when hungry one’s not picky
So with fingers somewhat sticky
I arrive within the store

I stroll past aisles and freezers
By the geriatric geezers
Sucking chocolate off Maltesers
Leaving the honey core

And I can be a smart boy
See I brought along a decoy
My second cousin called Roy
Whose annoying to the fore

He’s loud and really prying
Saint Peter’d find him trying
Questions until you’re crying
And spread eagled on the floor

Imagine my sweet delight
When I noticed the sight
Of old Roy going just right
To the guard beside the door

Questions started rolling
From my cousin’s constant trolling
The guard’s eyes started lolling
Like I’d seen so much before

The guard’s eyes did deaden
His face began to redden
And I thought that we were heading
For a moment of great gore

And sure enough he broke
His inner fire awoke
He took a mighty stroke
And knocked roy to the floor

Then everybody screamed
I was better than I dreamed
And quick enough it seemed
He was dragged out of the door

So there’s the route to go
When dealing with a foe
Just send someone you know
They can’t help to give what for

Haikus 02/04/14

Soul-sapping deadlines
And very little freedom
Industrial work

Earthquake, many dead
A frantic check then, relief
My love js ok

Against nature’s wrath
Cities fall, stone turns to dust
Small’s the human race

Rainy Day

Drip! Drip! Drip!
The drip of rain on glass
Falling from steel-grey skies
Cold and unfeeling
Caring not a jot for the lives of men

Crackle, Crackle
The sound of wood on fire
Each sharp report followed by starburst of orange sparks
Sailing through the air
In their fleeting mayfly existence

Rustle, Rustle
You shift the blanket beside me
Look me in the eye as we listen
To the drip of the rain outside
And the crackle of the fire in front of us

There is nowhere I would rather be

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