I’ve got to go
Things to do
Don’t think I’m not sore
But needs must
Do not be sad
Do not remember what is lost
But what was had
What had been gained in our meetings
What we will carry forever
I’ve got to go
But I will be back
To not do so would be unconscionable
So until then dear friends
I bid you adieu.
I want to watch porn in HD
To see details so much more clearly
I know what I will like to see
So I want to watch porn in HD.
*
I want a nice glass of Whiskey
I think I deserve it you see
A good dram goes down so easy
Like the girls on the porn in HD.
*
I want a night out just for me
To see what I want to see
For life to gather round me
So much better than porn in HD.
Gather round young people and I’ll tell you a tale
It will entertain, no chance it will fail
Of an evening some years back that quite simply ROCKED
The night me and Harry, my best mate, got locked!
*
It was on a Friday, at five in the evening
Two hours in Malloy’s, no sign of us leaving
Spouting out bollix, talking the shite
You’d have to agree, great start to the night.
*
From there we decided, to move right on down
For further libations out on the town
First guarding ourselves against energy dips
With world standard soakage, of burger and chips.
*
We reached town quite quickly, about half past seven
And from that time on, where in drinker’s heaven
Pints and shorts, bottles galore
Acting like kids in a candy store.
*
As time moved on we left the pubs
And graduated then on to nightclubs
Shots and cocktails on the menu
Expensive fodder I can tell you.
*
But it was worth it, the man confesses
The lovely ladies, skimpy dresses
Giving looks on the dance floor
We joined in, need I say more.
*
By this time though, we were so drunk
Our dancing style was free-form junk
Still, two you ladies were amused
Can’t tell why, we were confused.
*
They were named Jen and her friend Grace
Supple of body, pretty of face
Closely together, we both did dance
We thought we both were in with a chance.
*
The music soon finished, the lights turned on bright
Unfortunate Harry was given a fright
He’d seen in the brightness, found to his chagrin
That Jen in reality was ugly as sin.
*
I on the other, had simply lucked out
Grace was a beauty, there was no doubt
And hand in hand walked back to her place
A great big ol’ grin upon my fat face.
*
I was there in Grace’s until the next day
By then for my excess, I’d started to pay
Shuffling in agony, the long walk of shame
Then a dark room and bed, to sleep off my pain.
*
Harry, the trooper, had stayed with her friend
But was joyed by the stuff she did in the end
Years later, no lying, he married that girl
They get up to stuff that will make your head swirl.
*
So that was our tale of the night on the lash
I hope you don’t find it too crude or rash
And the next time you go out until all hours
You will end it as sweetly as we both did ours.
How come though we’re warned we still touch wet paint?
How come though you’re sinful I say you’re a saint?
How come each every evening we bicker and fight?
How come our fights end with a wonderful night?
How come your craziness is driving me mad?
How come I stick with you though they tell me you’re bad?
How come I’m still here after all we’ve been through?
How come in the end I’m in love, with you?
Just in case it all goes wrong
Just in case I fail
Just in case I don’t last long
I’ve made a way to bail.
*
Just in case you tell me “No”
Just in case you spurn me
Just in case you tell me “Go”
To quench the flames that burn me.
*
Just in case this is my last
Just in case my heart’s broke
Just in case I need out fast
Escape with puff of smoke.
*
Just in case you smile at me
Just in case you say so
You know how happy I will be
So ask you I will go.
If you could just cop on for a second
Realise that there is more to life than you
That other people have needs, have things to do
That we are not your slaves
That would be something.
*
If you could stop for a second and calm down
Keep yourself from running about in a state of madness
You have a long life to live, no need to do it all in a day
The future will still be there tomorrow
Try and spend more time in the now.
*
It time you woke up and smelled the roses
You have been in your own world for too long
Things are happening around you
If you don’t get moving you will miss out
We don’t want to leave you behind.
You’ve brought out a baby?
My god man! That’s low
It’s got such cute dimples
I’ll tell all I know
I don’t want it crying
Where you need me, I’ll go
So fast it gives me a chill.
*
You have a small puppy?
You’re crazy, that’s bad
It’s so cute and fuzzy
It’s driving me mad
I’ll give all you want
Don’t make it look sad
This treachery’s making me ill.
*
You bring a hot model?
You bastard, that’s cold
For just one more look
You have me, I’m sold
If goodness won’t get her
Okay, I’ll be bold
Its wrong but it gives me a thrill.
One morning while walking the dog
We found ourselves in a thick fog
To home I did make
But made the mistake
Of tying the lead to a log.
One night I went down to the pub
To partake of delicious Pub-Grub
The third T-Bone steak
Was all I could take
So I had to lay down in the tub.
You often ask what do you do
If a tiger comes walking by you?
Not just will you fail
If you grab the cat’s tail
You’ll be covered in tiger doo-doo.
joe2poetry 